5 Important Skills That Aren’t Taught At School
Some skills that we need to know rather than we are “supposed” to know
Ever since we were born and then parents put us into school which included sitting on the class to watch our teacher taught us some subjects and gave us some questions to answer. Sometimes they praised some students who had the right answer without any concern to some students who had wrong answers even they already tried it.
The formal education system missed out the impact they’re causing on the character development which is more crucial in the real world. Instead, they teach us by memorizing such the name of the capital city or the year of some events. They teach us what we are “supposed” to know rather than what we need to know and yes, that totally sucks.
Well, maybe geography or history are important to someone who wants to be a geographer or historian. I am not one of those and most of us are neither.
The kind of irony in life is that most of us graduated and then looking for a job, getting the job, getting monthly income, spending some of it, saving some of it, paying the taxes, facing the problem, solving the problem, and after decades, we retire. And if we are lucky few more decades, and then we are going to die. Does it mean what we are supposed to do is to be alive or just to make a living? Think about it for a moment.
Our school teaches us how to survive but all we need to do is to thrive in the world. We don’t really need to learn about the facts but rather to learn about the way how to think.
Most of us will die sooner or later but the tragedy of life is not the dead itself but what we let die inside of us while we still have a chance to live. We don’t need to know what we are seemingly “supposed” to know but rather we need to know what is important and useful for living.
“Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you fortune”. — Jim Rohn
Let me share some skills which are never taught at school but they are essential for living in the real world.
1. Critical Thinking Skill
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”
— Albert Einstein
Growing up made me wondering about some things, but I never asking about it in the class because I was too scared that my friends and teacher would label me as the stupidest student if I don’t know the answer. So, I never dare to meet with disapproval or to speak up.
It feels like my school taught me to shut the fuck up.
At schools they mostly label some people as the smartest by putting them on the list from a higher score to lower score without concerning the student’s mentality such as lack of confidence, feel unworthy, shame, etc.
It makes sense for me that school’s purpose just only for producing more modern-day workers who are more competitive in the corporate job. But having critical thinking is more important than following the majority rule in the real world because as we grow older, then our problem is also bigger. The truth is not because the problem itself but we don’t have ability to identify and analyse to find some solution.
We need some skills to solve our problems that either come from our relationship or within ourselves. And the funny thing is none of any lessons that are taught in school will solve our real problems in real life. For example, can math, biology or chemistry solve your anxiety problem? You answer it.
What I’m saying is formal education is important but it is not everything.
Critical thinking is a rarity in this world. Moreover, critical thinking is like muscle the more you exercise, the stronger it is. So, the more you think, the better you are.
Stimulates your critical thinking by reading, listening to an audiobook, learning something new, writing, having a meaningful conversation, be more curious by asking questions, and spending time to do reflection.
2. Active Listening Skill
Most people pay more attention to what they are going to say next rather than to understand what is being said.
If people don’t have this skill, it will lead to a lack of connection and authenticity for the other person. On the other side, we are social creatures with the most basic need is to understand and be understood but it will not happen if we don’t pay attention to listen.
Study shows that being understanding in the group have a significant impact to our mental and physical health. So, if we don’t put attention and energy to listen someone else, it shows that you give bad impression and that is sign of an unhealthy relationship.
For example, when someone told you that he has overload on his job which causes him to burn out, but you are thinking what are you going to say next, your body language is signalling that you are not listening. And you might not respond appropriately because you are thinking about something else.
Research shows that people who receive active listening response will be more understanding and satisfied than those who do not.
Here is a great tip to become an active listener, try to listen for accuracy into what other people say once they finish speaking. For example, when your friend told you that she is stressed in the office because of her new boss, you can say “is your new boss act annoying to you?”, it shows that you listen for a meaning and try to recognize her feelings.
Be fully present for the other person when they speak will lead to more meaningful interaction and that is a massive part of active listening.
3. Communication Skill
Doesn’t matter how smart or competent you are, as long as you can’t make someone else to understand, the point will become meaningless.
There are people around you who have the highest technical skill but struggling to get a job and there are people with barely any technical skills who can get a job easily. One with good communication skills can outshine a bad one with excellent skills just like the example before.
Try to be more structure and simple to explain about the idea or concept to other people will make them more easily to understand what you mean. Maybe you can explain first to your friend before to the group.
Be the most knowledgeable person in the room will be not as significant if you can’t communicate well to another person. Having knowledge for ourselves will improve our life, but sharing knowledge for other will significantly improve our relationship.
Communication skill is like any other skill that you can learn through practice. For example, you can engage in debating other people, reading some books, writing and watching ted talk. As you are consistent to do more practice, it will hone your communication skill.
4. Learning a New Skill
I know we learn for long term period from primary school till the college and because of it, some people think that they don’t need learning any more, but the fact is the first time we learn is after we graduate. Being a learner is a never-ending process because it is the only way to be more adapted towards life circumstances.
A few years ago, we worked at an office but now we work at home and so many things change currently in just a year. What was relevant yesterday isn’t relevant today and what was solution for today isn’t relevant for tomorrow, it’s the same with the skill. As Peter Ducker said:
“The only skill that will be important in the 21st century is the skill of learning new skills. Everything else will become obsolete over time”.
The only constant in life is change and the people who always learning a new skill to improve their life is the person who can constantly change.
You can master the skill of learning a new skill by reading some books on different subjects, practice critical thinking, listen to the podcast, engage in deep conversation, take some courses, try new experiences. Whatever you do, just keep learning.
5. Financial Skill
A few years ago, I knew nothing about the field of finance, what I knew is getting a good job, having monthly income, spending some of it and saving some of it, and the cycle was repeated. For me, finance is complex and does not fit in with myself because what I thought is the person who works as a banker, investor, accountant, and etc.
A couple of months ago I read a book of The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel, this book is not really about a full explanation of the finance’s world but how the way we behave with money based on our personal experience and it changes my perception of finance which I thought to be good at analyzing about balance sheet or stock portfolio.
I am not saying that we have to forget about some data that support our decision to invest but most of us acted the way it is based on our personal experience. As an adult, I grow up with the cryptocurrency world than the stock market and it makes me comfortable to put my investment into those coins.
I follow the principle of Morgan Housel which is being adopted by Warren Buffet that’s “to invest and hold on forever” because that is the way of compounding works.
In today’s world, being a worker in a corporate job to earn some money is not enough, you need to be financially literate as well.
You can learn more to know how money works for you by reading some books that I think are good for starting point such as Rich Dad Poor Dad, Think and Grow Rich, Psychology of Money, The Intelligent Investor. Or you can watch the YouTube Channel of The Psychology of Money, Financial Education, and learn more about Cryptocurrency.
Final Thoughts
We live in a world that values degrees more than some skills we need and it makes us tend to prioritize more formal education than self-education. Quite irony in life I must say, we keep struggling to make living.
Can you imagine how much simpler things would be if we are taught some skills that we actually need to know? But yes, now we are more likely to do things in a complex way.
Everything changes in this world vastly, but our education system is not quite a lot to change. They keep us to survive than to be alive. As John Adams said:
“There are two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live”
